Two Possibilities: Suffering or Happiness

By: Nirmala

There are two possibilities in every moment. The first possibility is to have all of our attention, curiosity and passion focused on what is happening. The other possibility is to focus that same curiosity, attention, and passion on what isn't happening, what is not present, or what want to be happening. The question is: In this moment, what are you giving your attention to? Are you allowing what is, or trying to change it in some way?

When our focus is on what is, our experience of what is opens up and becomes bigger, richer, and more complete. But when it is on what is not (the past, the future, or any thought about what is), our experience of the moment contracts and becomes narrower and full of suffering and struggle, because inherent in a focus on what is not is a struggle with what is.

When we look, we discover that most of the time we are in opposition to what is and oriented toward what is not. Life is mostly about how to make things better and get more pleasure, or how to get rid of the things that are painful. We are constantly evaluating our experience, looking to see what's wrong with what we are experiencing and how it could be improved. We tend to be focused on what's wrong with the moment or on what could be added to it to make it better. As a result, our attention becomes very narrow and our awareness very limited.

When we see how much effort we spend struggling with what is, the tendency is to struggle with that-to try to change that. We decide the solution is to change our tendency to try to change everything. But that is only more struggle: except now we are struggling with our tendency to try to struggle. In a sense, we suffer over the fact that we are suffering.

What if you just notice how much you suffer, without trying to do anything about it? Just allow struggle with what is to be here. Just recognize that for now, that is what is happening. This tendency to struggle with what is, is what we were taught or conditioned to do; and this conditioning is here and is also a part of what is.

At any point where we simply accept what is,we can see how all of the struggling comes from the idea of a "me". Without this assumption that something is happening to "me", there isn't much point in struggling to change the moment. Our effortful struggle to change things only makes sense if there really is a me. We struggle in service to maintaining the idea of a "me". In fact, the struggle is the building block of the "me". Whenever there is no struggle, the sense of a "me" is not there. Our suffering is how we have always maintained a sense of identity.

The tendency is to try to fix even this can arise again. We now try to change our belief about the "me". We may focus on getting rid of our identification, which is another way of focusing on something that is not happening. And so we still end up suffering because now we are at war with our idneitifications. Instead of orienting towards what is (our struggle with our identith), we are focusing on how we think it ought to be: I should know better by no than to be so caught in identification; I really should know who I am.

Another possibility is to be really present to this tendency to identify, without making any effort to change it. If that's what is happening, then that's what is happening. You just let it be that way. You can even be amazed by it all, including the fact that there is a sense of a me. You see how unreal this me is, but you don't struggle to be rid of it. There's no longer an assumption that something is wrong that needs to be fixed. This subtle being with what is is what ends the suffering and brings us fully into the now.

Whenever it is just fine for everything to be just the way it is including any identity and struggle, then much more of what is can be recognized in our awareness. If we are present to and allowing our struggle, then it is also possible to notice something beyond struggle and any effort to maintain our identity. What that something is, is our true nature or Being.

Along with identification and the suffering inherent in that, is the possibility of an awareness of this vast Being in which it all is happening. All the me is and ever has been is a idea, but we don't need to turn away from that or judge ourselves for it or try to get rid of it. Then we can start to also notice a beautiful, rich presence of Being, which is already allowing everything, including the idea of "me". We see that our struggle is only a small percentage of our experience and that this is all happening in an endless ocean of allowing. Being is and has always been allowing it all.

When we are allowing, we include in our awareness what it is that is allowing, and that is Being-which is who we really are. This realization can be a very jolting experience or a very quiet one because Being is actually very familiar. Every moment of allowing has actually been a moment of experiencing Being.

Paradoxically, what can open our eyes to the larger reality of Being is realizing how much we actually enjoy identifying. Once we completlely allow everything, it is easier to admit that identifying as a "me" has been fun. The appearance of a separate self is a creative act. It makes up the story of our lives, and these stories inspire many to create great literature and art. We may suffer from our identity, but we also love it. The "me" is not a mistake. It's as natural as everything else in this world. But there is also the even richer possibility of no longer taking the me to be the totality of who we are. Why limit ourselves to a small identity, when the much larger Being of our true nature is always here. In that there is no suffering.

Article Source: http://appliedhealtharticles.com

Well known spiritual guide, Nirmala has offered Satsang and individual Spiritual Mentoring since 1998. He provides free spiritual books and many more ways to experience his teaching on endless-satsang.com.
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